The Oxford Dictionary defines kindness as, “the quality of being friendly, generous, and considerate”. A true act of kindness is generated from a desire to connect to another, without an expectation of something in return. It is the basis of building positive relationships of any kind, and in the workplace, it is no different. However, when applying kindness within the workplace, the statistics are not optimistic! In 2011, 50% of workers reported that they were “treated rudely at least once a week” at work, and 30% of workers have reported that they have suffered from workplace abuse in the past. Why is it that work environments can be unpleasant, passive-aggressive, exclusive, and downright nasty at times?
The answer lies in the answers to these questions: How kind and respectful are the people within the company to each other? What conflict resolution practices are in place to resolve interpersonal issues? How focused is the company on the human experience within the organization? Do leaders have a pulse on how employees feel about the company?
Many leaders who read this may think: “We don’t have time to focus on company culture, we have to meet the stakeholders’ needs”; or “Focusing on kindness and culture in the workplace is just fluff and doesn’t matter all that much. People are hired to do a job…period”; or “We have too much on our plates to focus on how kind people are within the company”.
Here is the reality: Focusing on kindness and creating positive communities within the workplace is not adding something to the plate…
It is the plate!
Regardless of leaders’ awareness, the cultural climate shapes how people interact. When senior leaders neglect effective communication, positive relationships, and conflict resolution, negativity can arise – manifesting as resentment, gossip, and employee turnover. A key factor to toxic work cultures is poor role models from upper leadership, which can result in communication issues and poor relationships across the organization. Thus, it is vital for leaders to recognize that a healthy workplace culture hinges on promoting ways to improve the employee experience by promoting cultures of kindness within their company.
In 2021, in the height of the COVID19 pandemic, employers were forced to begin looking at what led to the “Great Resignation” and why their employees were leaving in the thousands. And, if there is one thing that organizations have begun to awaken to is that merely focusing on employee salaries will not cut it any longer. Employees, especially those in the Gen X and Z groups, are not satisfied if there is no focus on the human experience within the organization. In a McKinsey study looking at why more than “19 million US workers quit their jobs”, they found that 36% of workers who had recently left their jobs did not have another job lined up. That is a staggering number! That means income was not always a factor for employees leaving their organization. What the studies have since revealed is that a lack of respect and belonging were among the most common reasons why employees have left, and have continued to leave, their jobs.
So…What can organizations do to retain their current staff and make their culture attractive to new employees? The answer is to focus on building the internal community within the organization, promote kindness, and making the culture more human-centered.
#1. Create A Human-Centered Organization
One common issue that is a barrier to creating human-centered organizations is that many employers still focus heavily on the hierarchical leadership structure to hold teams and employees accountable. The issue with the hierarchical system is that it can encourage people to feel and act superior to others. It can create silos or normalize unprofessionalism throughout the workplace. Upper leadership typically make decisions with the ‘bottom line’ in mind, but not usually with the ‘human being’ in mind. This limited perspective can keep organizations from overcoming obstacles, innovating, or solving issues that could be a matter of survival!
Human-centered organizations always have the human perspective in mind. They ask themselves, “who will be impacted from this decision?” And then they ask, “who else will be impacted?” They keep asking until everyone who will be impacted is considered…and then they take time to ensure those individuals and teams are heard. Human-centered organizations create space for every voice in the room and creates space for safe vulnerability to be present. It is also imperative that senior leaders meet periodically with teams to ensure they have a heartbeat on what is important to those who work for them.
To transform organizational cultures into human-centered ones, leaders must be willing to look directly at the interpersonal behavior that is present and ask how they may be contributing to the current state within the organization. If leaders are willing to be introspective and ask themselves how they can improve their own interpersonal reactions, they can begin modeling and shifting the narrative into one that is positive and professional, rather than petty or unkind.
#2. Create A Culture of Kindness
The basis of having a great workplace culture is kindness. In a Harvard Business Review article, “Don’t Underestimate the Power of Kindness at Work”, the authors state that practicing kindness in the workplace boosts confidence, improves social connections, and can help drive organizational goals. When kindness is in the foundation of an organization, it influences how people engage with each other, how they resolve conflict, and how to foster a friendly, authentic environment.
In a recent Forbes article, Kindness at work: The New Link to Engagement and Performance, author Heather V. MacArthur states that “kindness at work predicts happiness at work, and happiness in life”. Having a Culture of Kindness creates a warm environment where employees and leaders can build connections that are authentic and genuine. When kindness is present, cooperation increases, which has a direct impact on collaboration, respect, and belonging. When employees experience kindness within the workplace, they are less likely to leave their organization, thus improving retention rates and engagement (and their bottom line!).
#3 Instill Internal Customer Service Standards
Organizations often preach to their employees and leaders about how important customer service is to those they serve; however, they rarely require these standards internally, which can create an imbalance between what the employee experiences inside the culture, and how we expect them to behave externally to customers. Companies can unknowingly create a double standard by requiring employees to be friendly and upbeat with their clients, but do not require the same integrity internally.
Imagine this scenario:
You have just come out of a meeting where your manager yelled at the team for everything they have done wrong over the past month. The team did not meet their quotas, and if they don’t improve, people may start losing their jobs. You walk out of the meeting feeling like you can’t do anything right, and you are afraid that you may lose your job, not be able to pay your rent, or send your child to the summer camp that is so expensive. However, you now must engage with customers in a positive way to resolve their problems; all the while you may be thinking to yourself, “don’t mess up or you will be fired”; or “My boss is such a jerk. I wish I could just tell them off!”. In addition to that, you must work with people that are unfriendly or unkind, which only adds to your discontentment. Not many people perform well under that type of pressure!
Now imagine a similar scenario:
This time, your boss shares with the team that they are under their goals for the month and that it is essential that everyone come together and collaborate on how to improve the numbers. They explain their worries and concerns and create time and space for everyone on the team to share their concerns and potential solutions. They end the meeting by thanking everyone for their contributions and schedule another meeting to align on a common initiative based on the team’s ideas. When you leave, you understand the importance of ensuring the success of the team to reach their goals, but now feel that you have a voice and are optimistic and empowered to engage in solving the issues as a team. From that place of empowerment, you are start thinking about how to make the customer experience a great one, so the team’s numbers increase, and the company becomes more stable.
The second example represents how most people would prefer to handle difficult topics. However, in many cases, this type of effective team communication does not usually come naturally. Leaders might face pressure and experience anxiety or nervousness about guiding their team appropriately, especially when things are not going well. Displaying empathy and vulnerability while discussing tough matters requires courage. However, honesty and transparency can contribute to employee retention and engagement by making it safe to discuss difficult topics. Employees who see their leaders working hard to maintain honesty and ensure that all viewpoints are considered feel more connected to the organization. This is a huge contributor to fostering a positive work environment and retaining valuable employees.
How would you truly feel about your organization if:
· People were friendly and helpful
· They made eye contact with you when you were speaking with them
· They greeted others with a smile
· There was a high level of integrity and follow through
· Others were courteous and respectful
· People respond to frustration in a professional way
Customer service standards are common knowledge, thus making it easy for employees to align the company’s expectations both externally and internally. Using them as a backbone for creating friendly kind workplaces and improving morale and interpersonal relationships.
#4. Have an actual process for conflict resolution!
Conflict is inevitable in the workplace. Competing priorities, interpersonal issues, and chaotic work environments can derail a team and send them spiraling into retention issues, passive-aggressive behavior, and unhealthy communication. Studies show that unresolved conflict impacts our ability to be creative and innovative. However, effective conflict resolution can help reduce stress, improve self-confidence, build better relationships, and increase overall energy. The truth is conflict does not have to be something that creates animosity or resentments.
What if there was a productive way to deal with conflict that left everyone feeling heard and a solution was reached? How would it feel if people within the organization were courteous and respectful and addressed conflict with kindness and a genuine desire to resolve it in the most amicable way possible? Many people would feel like they hit the jackpot and may never want to leave!
One barrier to resolving conflict productively is that organizations do not usually have a clear process for conflict resolution that employees can follow and practice when it arises. Training leaders to facilitate effective conflict resolution conversations builds a culture of open communication, trust, and authentic relationships. It helps teams to focus on solutions, rather than blame or avoid. That is why it is essential for organizations to design a system that is trained and practiced when interpersonal or interdepartmental issues arise.
#5. Make Culture A Priority!
It might be surprising to learn that focusing on company culture can profoundly impact an organization’s financial stability, profit growth, and customer loyalty. This is not an either-or situation. By nurturing communication and fostering positive workplace relationships, companies can enhance employee retention, work ethic, and job satisfaction. When organizations address areas needing improvement in a constructive and supportive manner, uplift their employees, and concentrate on cultivating a positive workplace culture, the result can be a thriving organization and an exceptional work environment!
When leaders commit to cultivating their organizational community through the promotion and practices of kindness, respect, and appreciation, employees are more likely to engage with the organization, be more loyal, and are much easier to retain. They may also develop a genuine desire to come to work daily and give their best efforts. This distinction can genuinely transform the organization, creating a mutually beneficial work environment for both the employee and company.
Kelli Oberndorf is the co-founder of Ekatā, a company that focuses on Culture Transformation, Leadership Development, and Conflict Resolution in the workplace. In her years of experience working within organizations as a leader and facilitator, she has helped to create and deliver programs that ensure people work for incredible organizations.
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